The Kiss — “…These no wheres and no times and the only home we have.”

Being Present

The moments of being in emptiness,
in the moment,
unaware of where you are or
what’s going on around you,
are the moments when we are
most focused on what we’re doing.
There is no thinking except
to what’s in front of you,
next to you, and how you feel
inwardly. Judgments not are
made on anything in the world
The only thing that matters is
the intricate details of the thoughts
and flow of the moment. Minute factors
beyond this do not exist.

7-9-05, by: Asttarte Deva Asttarte Deva

Tantra As Self Empowerment, by: Asttarte Deva

There are many sayings in times past on “reclaiming your power”, or “Women Power”, or finding empowerment through sports or martial arts. Few ever talk about, and even fewer know about the hidden secrets and power within Tantra. Tantra as empowerment is a way of reclaiming oneself, finding out who you are, learning tools to access who you are, and then practicing the Tantra techniques, exercises and practices. Tantra allows one a way of manifesting the life you want – the abundance you seek, the lower or beloved of your dreams, the harmonious and passionate relationship and love life you desire with the one you already have, the car or house of your dreams, and so on.

Tantra is empowering because it forces you to tap into your will and draw up energies within yourself to go beyond the uncomfortable until eventually it does become comfortable. I have found no other writings or research on Tantra as self empowerment, but this is one of the biggest reasons ancient masters studied and practiced, and also taught this powerful practice.

Tantra is Yoga, however, Yoga is not Tantra. Tantra forces one to become present to the pain within themselves as well as is open to one becoming present, at one and authentic to the joy and blissful nature of oneself. Tantra is about being open to what is. Yoga is about being a Warrior and controlling ones urges to just be still and allow the energies of feelings to move through them, while Tantra teaches one to embrace, be open and be real with those feelings; authenticity, however, done with presence, listening to the breath, and the still voice within. I love Tantra Yoga because it teaches me about the natural desires of the human nature and about being real and accepting of them, and using that realness within oneself as a vehicle to grow; by accepting what is.

Tantra as self-empowerment is as natural as following your bliss and listening to that inner voice inside yourself of what you should or shouldn’t do. It is also about doing a set of exercises to harness the deep emotions within yourself, so you can eventually pull them up and out of you, and let them go; be them rage, anger, sadness, confusion, numbness or fear.

Whatever the emotion, Tantra gives you a vehicle to transcend them. And that alone is empowering. And that alone allows anyone, anywhere to give birth to a new life; one of bliss, joy, contentedness and peace. This is why I call Tantra a miracle. This is why I call Tantra self-empowering. This is why Tantra can be used as a tool for Psychotherapy, and this is why Tantra is a gift from God. Asttarte Deva

The Love of A Stranger, a poem, by Asttarte Deva

When engaging in moments of an embrace in a strangers arms
Acceptance and unconditional love are met instantly
Like the euphoria of falling in love with a new lover
An encounter with the divine is welcomed in open arms of a stranger
With the breath, the presence,
And the openness to experience intimacy for what it is
Without a history of times past as in a deep-committed relationship
There are no triggers, no reminders of past hurts
The love of a stranger is met with openness
For no longing or hunger of a committed partner is there
One can just be,
And allow urges and awakenings to move gracefully
Across the air as a feather of a swift breath to the unknown
A stranger in the presence of the divine,
Can allow sudden passions to be awakened
Past memories or pains to be surrendered to this moment
In accepting what is, what feelings come up,
All memories or thoughts in the mind
That occurred before this moment
And everything become peaceful and beautiful once again
During these times we can forgive our present lovers
Or past lovers who we no longer share our lives with
We can just be, in love, with this new stranger
For a brief moment of time Asttarte Deva

Spiritual Poetry on Love

Tao Te Ching, by: Stephen Mitchell

(From a beautiful Goddess friend’s book named Emily Nussdorfer- Dance & Movement Arts Therapist. In our conversation, she had told me this is who I am, and I thanked her, and copied the poem.)

The Master has no mind of her own.
She works with the mind of the people.

She is good to people who are good.
She is also good to people who aren’t good.
This is true goodness.

She trusts people who are trustworthy.
She also trusts people who aren’t trustworthy.
This is true trust.

The Master’s mind is like space.
People don’t understand her.
They look to her and wait.
She treats them like her own children.


Excerpts from the poetry of
Mevlâna Jalâluddîn Rumi

Versions by Coleman Barks
From Unseen Rain,


Don’t let your throat tighten
with fear. Take sips of breath
all day and night. Before death
closes your mouth.

There’s no love in me without your being,
no breath without that. I once thought
I could give up this longing, then thought again,
But I couldn’t continue being human.


Excerpts from
Love is a Stranger

Poetry of Mevlâna Jalâluddîn Rumi
Translated by Kabir Helminski

The Intellectual

The intellectual is always showing off;
The lover is always getting lost.
The intellectual runs away, afraid of drowning;
the whole business of love is to drown in the sea.
Intellectuals plan their repose;
lovers are ashamed to rest.
The lover is always alone, even surrounded with people;
like water and oil, he remains apart.
The man who goes to the trouble
of giving advice to a lover
gets nothing. He’s mocked by passion.
Love is like musk. It attracts attention.
Love is a tree, and lovers are its shade. Asttarte Deva

Listening To Your Love, by: Margaret Truxaw Hopkins

Managing one’s own reactivity is especially crucial when the conversation takes place between people who share a close, caring relationship, whether in intimate partnership or within a facilitated peer group. In the container of such a relationship, there is potential for great healing, when listening is skillfully practiced with loving-kindness. When there is a breach in the intention and the attention, the opposite can occur, and there is potential for eliciting further suffering. Sometimes it is difficult to tell the difference. The process of releasing what has long been held tightly can hurt even as it heals. It requires a conscious choice and a disciplined practice on the part of the listener and the sharer to make the most of the opportunities a relationship generates. We are often drawn to a partner whose complementary issues offer us the most challenging, but most potentially rewarding, mirror for our own growth. Relationship built on a foundation of trust and deep listening is not for the faint of heart. But the rewards are worth the work.

When I am listening to my partner with skill, I can see more clearly which elements of a conflict belong to him and which belong to me. If I feel a strong emotional reaction to what he says, it is almost certain that something tender and vulnerable in me has been touched, and it is useful to note that for when it is my turn to be the speaker. When I am in a conversation without consciousness and care, my subjective reactions can spill out with little control, and the listening temporarily comes to an end. When I can tune my attention with awareness to his core dynamic, there is a better chance that the container will be strong enough for deeper healing work to begin. I can see my own needs and wants as well as his. Asttarte Deva

Yoga and Acupressure – mini updates September 2008

I’m planning to write articles for magazines. I’m in the preparation zone and preparing my mind, body and spirit for the big transition. I’m also painting and hope to create spiritual works of art to add to my writing, as well as singing; which I hope to one day replace the music I love of Donna De Lory and Deva Premal; with my own music as Asttarte Deva. I have a website in the works, that I am building at the present and hope to be done by Christmas. You would love the new site. It is a compilation of spirituality, energy healing, metaphysics, readings, poetry, bodywork, AND the big subject of Tantra. It is a long term goal in putting this together, and my hope is to eventually have it available for music, books, art, tantra dvds (that I create – reason why it’s a long term goal) and other products as well. The site is through a template that I may need to switch over in the future to something bigger and more professional, but it is a good start.

I’m working 3 or 4 days a week and have to take advantage of that small window where I can work, relax, or go out. We are our baby’s main babysitter right now; the father and I, and we have chosen this for many reasons; one is that we want to instill as much love in this little human being as we possibly can while it matters the most.

I’m taking a Yoga Teacher Training now. I literally signed up for it this past Thursday. I had been thinking about doing it all summer. I was inspired during a beautiful kirtan gathering at Main Line Yoga in Ardmore. Singing in kirtan is one of my favorite things to do, and being a part of the energy of love/God, creates awakenings in my spirit and soul, and in that moment, my guidance was communicating to me strongly that this course would be perfect for the next level of my development. The teacher training is called Yin Yoga, and it is an extremely powerful form of yoga for moving chi in the body; stuck chi, stagnant chi, and becoming more alive in the body by transforming the energy of emotions and physical blocks. The main focus for the course is moving the energy in the meridians such as in Taoism or Chinese Medicine. There are also a lot of key connections in the Yin Yoga Teacher Training related to Ayurveda as well as Tantra. It is a good balance for the Shiatsu Massage and Jin Shin Do Bodymind Acupressure training I have already done (as well as Yoga and Tantra) and reconnects me to that subtle, yet powerful form of healing through movement of the body, breath and energy of chi. Yin Yoga is not for beginners, however, beginners can use it to enhance their Yoga practice, or to help open the body through a subtle, calm, yet powerful practice. I look forward to the new calmness and spiritual connection to source this has already begun to create for me, and the new revelations it will offer for me in my work.

Blessings to all!
Namaste! Asttarte Deva

The Differences Between Tantra Yoga, Sexual Healing and Intimacy Therapy

Even though I offer all three of these forms of Healing in my work and on my websites, the three variations are completely different. Here is how it is explained.


Many people get Tantra Yoga confused with Sexual Healing, Intimacy Therapy, and Tantric sex. All of these have their own definitions and are all completely different from each other.

Tantra Yoga
Tantra Yoga offers the practices of raising the energy through the breath; without physically touching another human being. Although touching another can become a part of this practice, it doesn’t come until later, until one has reached a state of awakening and bliss within oneself. Tantra Yoga is a practice done solely and can be a meditation of stillness and a meditation of movement. It can be done sitting, standing or lying down. There are specific practices used to raise the Kundalini and open connections to oneself, and Tantra Yoga is where one needs to start to begin to awaken to these energies. In order to gain access to the Bliss and Ecstasy of Sexual Healing and Intimacy Therapy (Advanced Tantra Yoga) one must learn the basics. However, Tantra Yoga alone can offer an incredible amount of bliss and ecstasy, and once one realizes this, sometimes they no longer desire trying to get the ecstasy from another they so often thought they could achieve. Although, when you start with one you can most definitely move to another; in the order and time you are ready. Tantra Yoga is more like going to Yoga class and sitting and listening to the instructor guide the student through the poses; however, the poses in this sense are different movements of the body and different ways of expanding the breath. It is quite different.

Sexual Healing
Sexual Healing encompasses practices of Tantra Yoga, however, with a Practitioner giving a Healing Service with the receiver lying down, or sitting upright. Sexual Healing is not a series of learning exercises to practice as much as it is a practice to move energies to help you heal blocks of pain, numbness, anger, sadness or any other emotion that is in your way. Sexual Healing is a way of receiving the nurturing you need in specific areas of your body. It can include eye contact while you lie on the floor, energy healing or reiki anywhere on the body, massage techniques, and guidance on moving your energy.

Intimacy Therapy
Intimacy Therapy is a very intimate form of therapy and healing, and when one requests this as a session, they must be willing to be authentic to their own feelings within them self and allow them self to become vulnerable with their Practitioner. Often times, a client will need to come to the Practitioner for weeks or months before they are ready to allow themselves to trust the Practitioner they are seeing; unless they are already on a deep spiritual path and know within themselves that they are ready. Prior to Intimacy Therapy, the client will go through a few practices of Tantra Yoga and sometimes Sexual Healing before opening up to the Intimacy Therapy. However, in few cases, the client requesting the session will know exactly what they are wanting to address and heal and Intimacy Therapy can be performed immediately.


Often times, there will be a Practitioner who is truly a Surrogate or an Escort and has not had formal training in Tantra, but will still call themselves a “Tantra Teacher or Healer”; however, if they themselves have not gone through the training and can’t even meditate, then they are not truly a Tantra Yoga Healer or Teacher; however, the distinction is similar, but not the same.

Some Practitioners who are truly offering “Sexual Healing”, or are only giving pleasure or release and not guiding the student/client into the arts of Tantra with the practices of the breath and other exercises, are misleading the client.

All of these Practices are unique on their own. They each have a separate description and distinction from each other. And, they all are very important! Asttarte Deva

Important Tantra Topics of Discussion

Coming Soon!

Tantra in the Media

Open Relationships As A Way to Expand Consciousness, Grow & Heal

Why A Disciplined Tantra Practice is Important

The Energy of Love IS The Energy of God

Why Do Tantra Yoga? Asttarte Deva

The Basics of Tantra Healing

For those of you with no previous experience, I will now be offering sessions to better prepare you to be ready for the Advanced Tantric Arts.
(For Those of you with prior experience, please skip this post and scroll below).

It takes a very brave and committed person to take on the challenge of learning the Advanced Tantra Arts; and for those of you who have never had basic experience with Spiritual Healing or Spiritual concepts, we will need to start there – i.e. Spiritual Healing Sessions that do not consist of the Tantric Arts (the basics of Tantra), in an effort to be more prepared for the Advanced Tantric Arts offered on this website.

Tantra Practices Before Sexual Healing & Intimacy Therapy (Advanced Tantra Sessions):

You will need to learn the philosophies and concepts of energy, breathing, what the chakras are and how we can use them to expand our body and soul, body work for opening the flow of energy in your entire being, energy healing for clearing energy blocks or emotional stress, yoga and what the basics of yoga are, what it means to be present, how to create consciousness within oneself and to use your emotions, stresses and pains as a guide for your growth, what your emotional and mental blocks are, the value of working through them, some Spiritual Psychotherapeutic processing, what it means to be authentic, basic meditation, and more!

I will also offer breathing practices training and meditation guidance as part of this training.

More Information:

You may visit this blog for more information on these Spiritual Healing Sessions; however, I will be updating this blog to reflect this post for your better understanding. The fees are less for these sessions, and their main purpose is to prepare you to take the Advanced Tantra Sessions seriously. The new website will describe all the Spiritual forms of Healing I offer, for those of who who qualify for these services. (See post below for information on the new website). Please Note: The more gentle Healing Sessions are just AS powerful as the Advanced Tantra Sessions and are just as important. It takes a ready and willing soul to dive into the depths of Tantra, and Tantra is not just about sex; it is about the entire person!

I am now offering Basic Tantra Practices to prepare for the Advanced Tantra Sessions — to those who just want a quick fix, and who have never had any previous experience with Healing, Tantra, Spirituality, Yoga, or Self-Development before. The Basic Tantra Practices are imperative to understand the Advanced Tantra Sessions listed in posts below.

I will not forbid you from receiving the more erotic or Advanced Tantra Services, however, some basic principles will need to be practiced to get the most out of these sessions and in order to feel all of its benefits. Basic Practices and Advanced Practices can be incorporated within one session; but being committed to a series of sessions with me over a period of time will allow you the greatest benefit and the most expansion than just coming once with no prior experience at all.

This is my way of being authentic and truly listening to my own guidance. I didn’t come to Tantra as the beginning of my Spiritual Journey. I had to learn the basics for 10 years prior to that, and asking others to dive in and understand concepts in my Tantra Sessions can be overwhelming to many. This is my way of being real, and giving you the information slowly, one step at a time!
 Asttarte Deva