The Healer Who Was Raped

The Healer Who Was Raped

The process of healing from a major trauma is a long journey to come clean in one’s spirit and soul, in taking back their true essence from prior to an event as significant as a rape. Having been a powerful Healer prior to my own adult rape, it is amazing to witness myself in peeling my own layers and the amazing unfoldment that occurs. My main work was as a Spiritual Healer, a Psychic Channel and Intuitive Energy Worker, and a Transformational Massage Therapist. I had become an Ordained Interfaith Minister and had raised my vibrational level to such a high degree it was VERY difficult for me to go into normal public locations without being bombarded by others energies afterwards and needing to spend countless hours or days cleansing myself. I had strong gifts of being an Empath, an Intuitive, a Clairaudient, Clairvoyant and Clairsentient. My gifts were enormous, and slowly over time they have been coming back; with a mission and a cause. Now, the clairvoyance is the strongest, as well as clairsentience, empathic gifts and intuitive gifts, however, the clairaudient gift is still developing to what it was before.

The first 2 years after the rape had happened, I noticed I moved into SUPER high nova sex drive and needed, craved and wanted sex all the time. It was as though this area of my body was an empty vessel and there was no energy able to come through in my spirit to fill myself. Although it had felt as though I was just super sensual and able to channel my kundalini to a peak. Perhaps this is true, but I see now that there perhaps was a black hole there and there was nothing coming in or going out, and in a sense my body needed the energies of others in order to heal that empty space. The 1st year after a rape, a human’s body, a woman in particular, is unable to feel the trauma in herself. It is as though it never happened and remains a void, however, the following year and especially the 3rd year after the soul has completely caught up with the event and the need and desire for comfort, support and nurturing is at an ultimate high to feel loved, supported and cared for and to help the emotions of the trauma leave and love to return. However, as a Dakini, and being a single mom, I did not get the support I needed to heal the trauma. I had to deal with it all on my own, heal it all on my own, and be a giver, nurturer to others at the same time. My comfort was in giving to others and this was my way of receiving some of the support I needed. However, it was never the depth that my spirit, heart or body truly needed, and a small hour or two was always just a tease and taste of what my body truly craved. It in a sense was running on an empty bucket.  Having a wounded father for my child, who was unable to have the ability for empathy to give for someone such as this made it almost impossible to heal. However, I AM a Warrior, and would not give up, for I knew who I was before, and being a Healer when this happened, I learned a great lesson: TO ALWAYS TRUST YOUR INTUITION even if others want to be with you, be with your energy and spend time with you. Sometimes when you are integrating from a powerful healing training, it is BEST to spend time alone, and truly integrate all the vibrational healing that one experienced, and giving in to others that “want” to spend time with you, may in fact harm you so much more. And for myself as a Spiritual Healer, I had to truly forgive myself for giving in to someone who harmed me, whom I had trusted. And, the same lesson showed up in my son’s father.

I spent the past few days with another amazing Healer, and he truly helped my yoni open, and shed its tears, for crying out the blame I had placed not on my rapist, or on my son’s father who was raping me energetically all this time, but I had placed the blame on myself for having chosen these individuals and trusting them when in truth they should not have been trusted. The forgiveness showed up as I received nurturing healing this past weekend, in my womb that normally would have been in pain for 2 weeks after having sexual contact, and this time my womb was pain free! My Beloved friend who shared intimacy with me, cared for me, gave me energy healing on my womb, and his light was SO strong that I was able to release the emotions that my yoni had armored inside itself, and forgave myself for choosing to “hang out” and give energy to my rapist and my son’s father; who truly had raped me energetically all these 6 years. Now, I can say that my choice was my choice, and in this I let it go, and can start to love myself as I truly need once again.

What’s next is to protect my energy, continue to clear it, wear crystals in my bra, around my neck, continue to sleep with them, work with other healers to cleanse my aura and spirit body at a profound level to raise my vibration to what it was before, and even higher, and go to healing retreats, spend time in union with other healers, and so much more! I will now protect myself at a greater level with clients, and be much more selective with whom I allow in Session with me one on one, and perhaps take to additional work in writing, Phone Life Coaching or email Coaching and Yoga! I will be completing my Credentials this fall and have been invited as a special Guest in India for a Healing Retreat. My intention is to be there, come high or come water, and allow the abundance to come! I am praying to Ma Durga for protection and working with a Sufi Mystic for continued cleansing as well. I am truly grateful for prayer, other Healers, and the allowing of true love and healing to come in!

Om Sri Durgaya Namah! 
Asttarte Deva ~ Sharananda Devi ~ Earth Goddess ~ Wood Tigress!
This IS a time of celebration!


~ more to come…

The Monad The I Am Presence


The Monad The I Am Presence

What is the Monad (pronounced Mone-Ad)? This is the energy center above your physical body, a part of your soul body, on the very outer layer of your entire energy field. It can also be described as the energy connecting your physical body to the infinity of the universe. The Monad IS your infinite self and the self that is beyond the physical body; expanded out into the universe perhaps a thousand or a million miles away. Christians perhaps would call this space heaven, and see it as the energy in the clouds way above the physical earth. This is partially right, however, the Monad is your connection to the universe and the connection to your endless cosmic self; at the same time.

There is an energy above your head that looks like a tube of light that expands above the body and reaches up above the head to infinity. This tube of light is called the Antakharana. The space of infinity is the Monad. And the portal that connects your physical body to your Monad; the Antakharana, can often get clouded by living in a physical body, or from traumas from having lived on the physical earth. In order to clear the pathways to create a clean and precise channel of energy flowing from your physical body to your infinite body, the higher chakras and outer laters of the human energy field must be purified and cleansed.

The Soul Chakra or Soul Star is about 8 feet above your head and is the most significant chakra on the outer layers of the human energy field. A human being who is sick can go to the doctors for an illness, or a pattern of illnesses and continue getting sick, but when the energy around the human body is not purified, this same person can spend their entire lives going to the doctors (psychiatry or medical) while looking for a cure for what ails them. When this same person begins a journey of healing their energy field (the aura), their chakras, the different layers of the outer bodies around the human body, and purifies their connection to source/God/infinity, they can then heal not only their physical body but also their entire spiritual self.

The Soul Chakra gets filled with the stress from the physical body as the physical body continues to cleanse and release its patterns and stresses. The Soul Chakra is like the sponge and is waiting to be purified of all you have let go of. It is still lingering around in this Chakra and all that you have healed from or cleared will still be close at hand until this Chakra is also cleansed. This is one of the first chakras from the physical body, above the Crown Chakra, and as this layer is cleansed, your toxins continue to cleanse higher and higher up the ladder to the Monad. When the entire portal is cleansed you become one with all that is, and in a sense, feel as though you ARE God, or you are no longer a physical body. It brings you back to the reminder that you are a spirit; not just a physical body, but also the Soul. And when you leave this physical body, you will still go on; taking refuge in a new body once you leave the one you are presently living in today.

You are an infinite being, with infinite energy, and infinite resources to become enlightened, empowered, and purified. The energy body around your physical body is like a science unto itself, and the medical system today, has a very limited resources to its power. When you cleanse all that is around you, you also cleanse all that is within you. Like a sponge, when the energy around your physical body is purified and healed, is takes on the energy of the physical body to purify yet again, as one layer of cleansing leads into another. The entire human race could heal completely of all traumas, all physical ailments and toxins and all human conditions when they heal not only the physical body, but also the entire energy body; the self that they are around the their physical body. There is a huge world of healing untapped when one spends their life trying to healing only on the physical level. Their may be lessons for them to learn that they are not getting. However, once they tap into their spiritual self and tune into the depth and power of who they are at an energetic level, they only begin to see their full potential, their true power, and true healing finally arises.

The Power of Prayer – A Universal Practice

Whether you’re a Sufi, or a Seek, a Muslim, a Hindu, a Witch, a Buddha, a Shaman or a Christian, or something else, there IS power in prayer, no matter what your faith is.

Prayer is a practice that has power no matter what style someone is praying, or what tool they are using to pray, prayer in itself doesn’t require a religion, nor a tool to utilize while doing it. However, there is significance for some, to acquire a tool like prayer beads or mala beads, or candles or something else, to allow someone to have a focus in which to place their mind on the intention at hand. However, INTENTION, is all someone really needs. Anyone can be intentional, and it doesn’t require any specific prayer to a certain God, or angel or God or other in order to put focus on what someone wants, needs or is praying about.

Prayer in itself is magical. It can allow someone to have faith in an outcome, a belief to make something possible, and allows a shift in their energy to instead be about fear or failure, to instead be about trust, faith, acceptance and allowance.

Prayer puts your intention out into the universe and opens and expands your energy to let go of the desire and put it into the energy of the world. Prayer shifts your consciousness and surrenders your will into the world and the energy you are putting out their has more space to return back to you. When you keep your prayer inside, stay silent and hold the energy internally, you are leaving the prayer up to your own source; rather than allowing the WHOLE universe to help and assist you. The energy of the universe is ENORMOUS! Why not let the whole energy of the world assist you in your dreams!

No matter your faith, prayer creates miracles! And magic certainly DOES happen!