Sex and Dating

Sex and Dating

sex and datingSex and Dating

I’ve mentioned in past posts how sex can bring up deeper issues hidden in the core of someone’s being. If the issues that are brought up were not dealt with before, or are triggered by the new lover and come to the surface, the best thing to do is face them head on. Sometimes the feelings that come up from the past is something you would rather stuff to the ground, repress it, keep it hidden, not confront it at all. But how do you move past a superficial connection to something magical, powerful, harmonious and beautiful if you ignore what is showing up for you? A relationship is a powerful tool for healing and can be a miraculous journey of growth, if you let it.

The best thing to do, is get clarity on where you are at, and sit with it, breathe with it, and feel into it. Communicate with your lover/partner/girlfriend that you are working through something. Don’t leave them in the dust to try to figure it out, guess and wonder what’s going on. Communicate at least to let them know you are ok, you’re processing something, and will return once you feel more complete on what has been brought up for you. If you like the person, and there’s potential of a great relationship, do your potential partner the courtesy of communicating with them; even if its minimal communication. Let them know what’s going on, you’re still around, and will return. This acknowledges the new potential relationship that there is a connection and hope of a relationship still exists.

Its totally ok if you have been triggered into your deeper issues, wounds, feelings. This the woman would see as a strength, and she would respect you for it. If you neglect her existence, she might not think you care, and may very well move on to someone new! So speak up, say something. Show you care, and don’t be silent! Your voice, your feelings and your relationship matters! It’s the stepping stone to something wonderful!

This is often a huge reason why I suggest becoming friends with your potential lover or partner before engaging in deeper intimacy with them. So, there is trust, safety and love, and you know they aren’t going anywhere just because a trigger came up. Its something that can be worked through, and the foundation of the relationship has already been built. Relationships always bring up things for people. If someone runs at the first trigger in the relationship, the possibility for a relationship with that person is impossible!  There’s many more things to work through, and if you run at the first chance of a trigger, no relationship with ever grow!

Let’s hope for foundation to be built in new relationships, safety, trust, love and breakthroughs to happen again and again!

Much love,

Asttarte

LoveSexandTea.com/index.php/Sex-Coaching

Dance, Empowerment and Emotional Healing

Dance, Empowerment and Emotional Healing

Dance and Emotional Healing
Journey Dance

Dance and Emotional Healing

I’ve stumbled upon some miraculous forms of dance as of the past 6 months. I never knew these styles of dance existed, until my ex introduced them to me. I am so grateful to him for that! If you are a spiritual person, into the healing arts, yoga, Shamanic Healing, or just like to try things different, these styles of dance are amazing! It’s hard to even decide what one is my favorite. I’d say all of them!

Journey Dance, great for freedom of expression, live drumming, very Shamanic, and rhythm to the tunes the teacher puts on. Whatever music the teacher decides will make or break the class. You can express yourself and break open limits you have around your ease to feel comfortable in your own body. You can learn to feel pleasure just from movement, your sensual nature and begin a journey of self love.

contact-improv
Contact Improv

Contact Improv, an amazing form of dance mixed with martial arts! It is great for healing the need to feel connected, included, seen, important, loved, and accepted for who you are! This style of dance has you rolling on the floor, over people, and others rolling over you, literally all their weight drops into your body. You learn how to glide into someone standing vertical, using arms, your upper torso, hips, and legs all as tools to move into or away from someone. You learn to use your entire body weight to support your movement. You learn to hold someone with your weight, letting them lean into you, and they support you the same. It’s a lot about surrender and trust. You may lift someone up on your back, or be lifted and supported on theirs, being pulled in towards someone with their arms and all the way

contact improv
Also Contact Improv

behind them, and keeping the connecting where you continue to move in the opposite direction. Gravity becomes your friend, slow movement and your breath is your guide!

 

 

 

5-rhythms
5 Rhythms Dance

5 Rhythms, an amazing transformational style of dance, also very Shamanic. Here, you move at your your own pace, your own rhythm, and the focus is on individual strength, and finding the connection to your internal source of power. This style of
dance works with the different elements, and the music moves you gracefully from one element to another, from the most subtle breath, to the deepest and most rough stomp on the earth. Each element taps into a different part of your psyche, where you take a journey of your soul, from armor, stagnation, depression, repression and fear, to elation, joy, expansion, healing your heart, self love and bliss. This style of dance is empowerment, healing, and breaking barriers to your true self!

open-floor-dance
Open Floor Dance

Open Floor, an amazing new style of dance, well new to the Philadelphia area. This is a major style of emotional healing and dance therapy. Many psychotherapists go to the training as part of their therapy practice to add more skills for their patients. This style of dance, helps one to truly get a feel of all of who they are in a class. It taps into the hidden cells in their body, and almost does an awakenin
g of the inner child, honoring that inner part of you, and letting the child essence of you to become free. Each class is different, and the teacher will bring in new skills to awaken different aspects of your senses, different aspects of your personality, and then at the end everyone gets a chance to share what they got out of the class. Again, the music makes the class, and you move how you feel guided, and can rest or dance assertively, whatever you feel called to do!

freedom-dance
Freedom Dance

Freedom Dance, another amazing style of dance! Here, everyone starts on the floor, laying down, and listening to their breath. This style of dance is like yoga in a dance form. Again, another Shamanic type of dance. The teacher takes you again through the different elements of the earth. In this style of dance, moving through the elements is very obvious and clear. I will be glad to know when this style of dance comes around more often. The teachers are amazing, and again, it is an opportunity to heal hidden aspects of yourself. What was clear about this style of dance, is the level and degree of ones own boundaries, and what they are comfortable expressing, how one is comfortable connecting, or the walls one has up or witnesses in another, and the needs one has to be alone. You may discover your passion for life in this class, and what barriers you need to break through to become a more enlivened and powerful you!

All of these styles of dance are incredible! And, if I could, I’d take a teacher training in one of them!

I’m sharing this with you, because of my love of this art, and new awareness of how much it can help someone heal their internal world, and become free to be who they are!

contemplative-dance
Contemplative Dance

I also love Contemplative Dance! Contemplative Dance started off with a Buddhist meditation, and then slowly we crawled on the floor. Then we move to our own rhythms, solo at first. Moving limbs, breathing and rolling around like a baby almost, in first discovery of having a body. Then we moved more and more into conscious awareness of our muscles, until finally we were all standing. And we explored using sounds, sometimes very loudly, sometimes softly. Then we moved to contact in very fun, unique, and creative ways, almost as a meditation, or yoga style with very slow still and focused steps, until they were fast movements, jumping, bouncing or laughing! It was quite interesting. Give it a try!

 

Lyme and Living Powerfully

Lyme and Living Powerfully

images1Lyme and Living Powerfully

If you have Lyme Disease, and you are confident about it, how do you live a powerful life despite what you might be dealing with? First off, every single person has different symptoms. You might be fine for months or years without noticing any symptoms at all, and then you might go through a change and have enormous symptoms that need to be taken care of. Or perhaps you might have symptoms that are manageable, but then you get to a certain point where you are tired of dealing with those symptoms, and want your body to feel amazing all the time!

Having Lyme can be a gift in a certain perspective. It will bring up emotions in your body that you didn’t know existed, and may have been suppressed your entire life if you didn’t have a physical symptom that caused pain and made you have to look at yourself.  Some people may have fear of death, anxiety that was already in their body before Lyme, perhaps depression before the Lyme, internalized and deeply repressed anger, or other emotional experiences that the Lyme actually made one confront. Why does having Lyme make one confront these very core imprint and DNA patterns in the body? Because its a part of your internal truth, how you developed as a young child, perhaps even feelings carried over from past lives (if you believe in that), and the enormous level of pain over a long period of time makes people need to confront some very primal aspects of their identity. Having Lyme is not like having a car accident, where you go to the hospital and get treated for a couple days and then go home. It is a VERY long term dis-ease, that causes one to address some very deep rooted feelings they may never have confronted without it.

Perhaps like Cancer, it makes one question their life, why they contracted the cancer, where they were holding grudges and anger, who they blamed and made wrong, and if they truly want to live. It makes people question their thinking, how they feel about things, and their life, Similar to Cancer, Lyme makes people have to face the pain over and over and over again, and in doing so, go through deep emotional processes of healing. Perhaps this alone is why I myself did not figure out I had it until I transformed my identity, my psyche, and emotional life. The emotional, mental and spiritual self needs to be dealt with often before the physical self can be healed. And the more emotional feelings are stored in the body, the longer it may take someone to heal. So, healing the emotional self, does empower someone to heal the physical self.

After you have dealt with the deeper core emotional issues, you can feel empowered, integrated and aligned on a psychological level, and when pain arises, or fear, it comes and leaves just as quickly as it arrived. Often any anxiety one used to have or depression one used to have, diminishes or dissipates altogether. So for those who have had a lot to heal psychologically, in a way, it can be a blessing. The next journey is in empowering the physical self!

How does one heal the physical self? Well after you have dealt with the psychological self, you can empower yourself, inspire yourself, and encourage yourself to keep finding answers, and know and believe that after you had healed all the other aspects of who you are, healing lyme actually is quite a snap! Not that it is easy, however, the journey to healing may be much less than the emotional and spiritual one!

The important thing is listening to the body, and letting your own body be your natural healer and teacher, and trusting that over anyone else!

For anyone with lyme, I hope to inspire you to know and believe that you can heal, and you don’t have to suffer! You can live an amazing, fun filled and passionate life, despite your circumstances! Things will get better, and you will thrive!

Much Love,

Asttarte

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

When To Go Past Dating

When To Go Past Dating

When to Go Past Dating

When To Go Past Dating 

How do you know when to take your relationship past the dating point? How do you know when to start kissing, being intimate, or becoming sexual? If you want the relationship to last, and not be just a sexual fling, it is often best to avoid deeper acts of sex and intimacy until you know for sure the relationship feels solid. There is that rocky stage in a new relationship where you want to be intimate, but you also want it to be the real thing. How do you know how long to wait and when to go past dating? Do you wait one month, three months, or four? Timing can be everything for each couple, and each individual.

It is crucial to discover how serious the person you are dating is, especially if you want something serious.  And if you find out two months in, they don’t want anything serious, its much easier to walk away if you haven’t had sex. But what if you have? Then what do you do? Do you walk away as soon as you know your goals are different? Or do you wait it out to see if perhaps the other person is not sure yet?

Most of the time, if someone tells you in the beginning of a relationship, that they don’t want anything serious, you should really listen to them. If they tell you they just want to have fun, or want to remain celibate, or are not looking for long term commitment, you should take whatever words they say literally. Their actions may be different than their words, but its the words in the very beginning that define how they will truly be later. If someone hints to you that they “think” maybe they are Bipolar, or that they have had a history of being afraid after things start to get serious, and hide or pull away, LISTEN to them! All of these initial honest clues will impact the rest of your relationship, and if they told you these things from the beginning, you WERE forewarned!!!

If your date, warned you about some major things that would impact your dreams of a healthy and serious relationship, and you didn’t listen, that’s your fault! You need to be the one to walk away, and you need to be the stronger one; not them. They are wounded, scared, conflicted, confused, or perhaps just a jerk. You need to be the wise one! And choose whether to go past dating and of deeper into the relationship, or end it!

It is best NOT to have any sexual intimacy with someone until you know for sure who they are, their habits, beliefs, goals, if you could be good friends, if they are healthy, if you are compatible, and if you can really see yourself with them for the long term. When you jump in right away, not truly discovering their true colors, things get sticky and challenging, and it only causes more pain later. Be smart, and wait. Trust your gut, and listen to your heart!

Asttarte

LoveSexandTea.com

Healing Lyme

Healing Lyme

img_0131

 

healing lymeHealing Lyme 

Once you’ve figured out you have Lyme Disease, the task to heal it is a rough ride. Whether you’ve had it for a few months, years, or decades, its an intense battle to finally get it completely out of your body. Choosing to either go the Western Medical Doctor route, or the natural medicine route is a big decision.

Choosing the Western Medicine route is a shorter path of healing it, about 6 months (for chronic lyme and a few weeks if detected right away), however, often other complications arise because of it. The medication forces ones body to heal quickly, and remove the toxins at a faster rate. Because of this, it often causes other organs, and parts of the body to have a challenge in the quick changes and they often need more support, and it can cause more problems as a result. Some people choose this route however, and trust the process. I have chosen a different alternative.

Once I found out, and was confirmed of my knowing for many many years, I began an alternative path immediately. I started with homeopathic right away, which I took some videos that are on youtube regarding the detox process just with this treatment.  http://youtube.com/user/AsttarteDeva/videos.  I felt the homeopathics were not enough, and I added a couple products. I had tried mushroom spores, however, they did not agree with my system at first. I tried them again later, but discovered that having a mold and dust allergy actually made them not really be effective.

I added MMS, and got to 15/16 drops. I had to stop once my body started purging it right after taking it.

I added Concentrace (liquid trace minerals traceminerals.com, has electrolytes, and probiotics in it among many other good things),

I took 1 drop of iodine daily in water

I resumed Oil Pulling, with Safflower, Sunflower, Sesame or Coconut oil (great for teeth too).

I resumed the ayurvedic foot massage detox,

I had started Biofeedback treatments (last fall 2015) (very intense), however, the woman I was seeing was hardly available. So, I tried a Zapper (not so successful) and Rife Machine to get for the home (expensive). It’s not as powerful as Biofeedback. They can be found at amazon or eBay.

I started a morning meditation and listening to high frequency sound waves. https://youtu.be/r4qM2ZkwrJA.

I started getting ionic foot detox baths. It pulls all the toxins out of the body. The color of the water determines what organs you are detoxing from.

I’m also planning to get: infrared sauna treatments, and possibly colonics.

I had started zeolites, (a Vit D spray, and Asea), and found after many months it wasn’t doing all that much.

http://cellconnection.teamasea.com/ for raising cell frequency.

Colloidal Silver is also a great thing to take on a daily basis, any kind of immune support and multi vitamin.

Yummy healthy smoothies are an excellent idea, and a healthy diet.

Also adding liquid chlorophyll and wheat grass is great for the immune system.

It is also highly recommended to omit all sugar, vinegar, corn, and all gluten and wheat products. Stopping sugar helps the body to stop building additional candida/yeast and parasites. However, a candida and parasite cleanse is super crucial I have recently discovered, and even more so to kill the source, the eggs that hatch, even after cleaning out the gut, bc they will keep regrowing and you’ll have to start the whole process over again and again.

There are also professional Lyme Specialists, as well as Chinese Herbalists who do acupuncture and treat the Lyme and their co-infections with herbs as an alternative. And, there are other paths as well. There are many paths for healing separate from getting antibiotics. Just make sure you do your detox at a pace you can handle, and afford. If anything seems to be too intense, back off, and let your body settle down first before increasing your dosage again.

And, if you choose the antibiotics route, please do your research first! Currently, there is no vaccination for this, but believe it or not, this disease is now known to be in 1 out of every 5 people. The percentage is high, and its not going anywhere. The only alternative is to get it out of the body, with persistence, commitment, an inner strength and a little knowledge to support you!

(Edited and updated August 6th, 2016)

Viagra vs Tantra Transformation

Viagra vs Tantra Transformation

Viagra vs Tantra Transformation
Viagra vs Tantra Transformation

There are many sources of what is causing your erection to not be as strong as it used to be, and if we find out the source, often we can also find the solution!

I’ve been doing tantra healing work now for over 11 years, and it’s amazing, but even more amazing is having added the tools of tantra, to my previous Reiki Master training, and Energy Healer trainings, along with Life Coaching and Psychotherapy tools. If I hadn’t had all that training, I probably wouldn’t be able to say that I can help someone with sexual dysfunction issues, or trauma stuck in his or her sacral chakra, or solar plexus, heart chakra, or somewhere else.

So what’s amazing, is that I find people who are on the fence with getting viagra, and have heard tons of horrible stories about it, and I stop them right there, and say, “Please DON’T take that stuff!” Too many bad stories about it, and way to dangerous! But what I do tell them is that I might be able to help. Most guys are looking for their erection. They wonder why they have gone limp, and often they are in a long term relationship or marriage when this happens. Most of the guys I have had success with this are 60 and younger. The guys older than this, the success rate is less, because it turns into a health issue and then we have to address the health. I don’t have as much experience of success helping it from a health standpoint, but I am learning and may take some further training so I do have more success.

However, if it is psychological, mental, emotional, or an energetic or spiritual reason, I can certainly help! Often it is one of these. For example, if you’re having trouble with your erection, but you’ve been in a relationship for a long time, most of the time, it is due to issues within the relationship, and we will move into Relationship Coaching to discuss the patterns in the relationship, or issues that might be causing some distance. If you don’t feel distant from your partner, and the relationship is going well, then it is an issue with yourself, something internal you are feeling, something you need to process and let go of, or perhaps something you need to forgive yourself for, or someone else.

Another example, if you are angry at your girlfriend/wife/partner and you are unable to get aroused, there’s your answer; the anger. Perhaps you have suppressed the anger and think you can ignore it, but then your body is telling you clearly that you cannot ignore it, by your loss of arousal or erection, then we can get to work on processing the source of the anger. If your partner has been blaming you for something, or judging you, or not appreciating or respecting you for something, and then you go to have sex with her, and are unable to get aroused, sorting through your own feelings about how she had been treating you up to this point, is what will help the erection come back.

Another option, is if you have a pattern of losing interest in being in relationship with someone, let’s say for 3 months or 6 months, and a year has gone by in a newer relationship, and the sex just doesn’t seem to be working as well as it did in the beginning, we may need to address some deeper core issues around commitment, intimacy, and the desire for freedom. This falls more into attachment styles, and if you have a tendency to be dismissive or avoidant in your relationships, and don’t know why you have lost your interest to be close, intimate or even sexual, we will look at the source of this.  Often it is something way deeper than you think!

Another possibility is if you are still in love with your ex! Let’s say you got into a new relationship and perhaps at your core, were not done grieving your ex, there’s a chance that you still are in love with your ex, and the energy between you and your ex also is still attached. This happens on a psychic level, and we will then do a spiritual energy cleansing process I call Cord Cutting, to help detach you from your ex, so you can feel your own body, and experience your life from a fresh start!

To go deeper into this possibility (still being in love with your ex), let’s say you are still in a committed marriage or relationship, and you decide to open it up and have an affair or perhaps your wife/beloved is fully aware of you seeing someone else, and your body is not a match for the decision you made! Your body, and your genitals, are telling you, that you are still committed to someone else, and you may have guilt, or a lack of integrity with yourself about the new relationship! Then you may be fully ok with dating, friendly, happy, playful, and can cuddle and even have great foreplay, but when the act of sex comes around, you shut down!

Massage and stimulation won’t alter your bodies response to what’s going on inside of you. If your erection is weak, or missing all together, the answer is not a physical stimulation, or even a drug that changes your physical reaction. The answer is what is underneath your bodies response. Our bodies are very powerful tools for what is going on inside of us, and whether you are a man or a woman, it doesn’t make a difference. Your body will communicate to tell you what is going on emotionally, mentally, energetically, and spiritually. We are a spiritual body, and often the answer to a pain, or in this case, a lack of arousal, you have to look much deeper than the physical. You can stimulate for hours and days upon days, until your sore or bruised, but it won’t transform the reaction until you do the real work; whats waiting inside of you; your heart, your feelings, your core emotional and spiritual self!

There are many sources of what is causing your erection to not be as strong as it used to be, and if we find out the source, often we can also find the solution!

Much Love and Joy to your passionate journey of yourself!

Asttarte

TrueTantra.net and AsttarteDeva.com