Desire After Being Single

desire after being singleDesire After Being Single

What happens after you’ve spent a long time being single after a breakup? I know there are many of you out there. You end a long term relationship with someone, for very psychological reasons, and choose to be alone to get over them fully, not jumping into a new relationship out of fear of being alone. You are perfectly content with being alone, and don’t choose to get involved with someone creating what they call a “rebound relationship”. Your desire starts coming back, and you want to make the right choices with who to be with. This is more a Relationship Coaching post (that I would normally post on MyLoverMyBestFriend.wordpress.com), however, there are also elements of Tantra in it as well.

You have a craving for passion, and yet, aren’t finding partners you feel aligned with, are not a good match, or perhaps aren’t even attracted to at all. Perhaps you’ve become more serious, or want to choose more seriously, not jumping into something out of lust or sexual frustration. However, you also have needs. You are a human being. Needs for pleasure and desire are perfectly normal.

What have you done to take care of those needs? What you choose to do, hopefully is done out of healthy reasons. Some, I’m sure will go to bars, strip clubs, and some men out there even go so far as calling a prostitute, a surrogate, or sexual healer. However, those aren’t always an option, and sometimes they are not good choices.

Going to Cuddle gatherings is a great way to receive the nurturing touch you need, and perhaps find a new play partner at the same time.

Finding someone who is willing to be a cuddle buddy, or be a buddy in general is a great solution.

Finding a friend who is a casual connection and there is a attraction as well, is a great way to support that need for passion and desire.

Perhaps you want to find someone who would love to do a massage trade is a good answer.

Perhaps joining a group of something you’re interested in.

Perhaps a poly group, a swingers club, or even a book club.

And, some like to go to events such as Om (Orgasmic Meditation) through One Taste to fulfill their needs.

And others like to just hang out with friends, looking for that special someone and practice orgasms for one.

Whatever you choose, know you are not alone! There are others out there too, and you can find ways to fulfill your desires in your way, and in your own style!

Sacred Foot Massage

Sacred Foot MassageBubbles, warm water, and lavender oil await your longing feet to be touched, pampered and adored for an hour of intimate bliss and love! To be touched, and embraced with kindness opens up the heart, clears ones energy, and allows one to surrender into the experience of receiving; being nurtured, pampered, appreciated, respected and offered unconditional love.

I love watching someone melt, and relax in peace, knowing they are in safe arms, cared for, and can surrender their true feelings. It is fulfilling to give the gift of love, and be received with gratitude that they allowed you to help release their stresses, sadness, or anxiety, and opened their heart.

Sacred Foot Massage is much more than a massage. It is a full body experience of bliss, energy cleansing, pampering, and opening up to the greater gift of ones own heart, as the heart melts its fears, worries, concerns and stresses, and can relax into the unknown, as though time was nonexistent. A true healing experience in formed, and with delight and trust, sometimes ones heart opens even greater and tears of love release from the body, as the stress leaves and changes form.

The opposite of stress and anxiety is bliss. As the body shifts the stress, it opens up to a kundalini wave of energy flowing that takes over and manifests as bliss. Bliss is a full body feeling of pleasure, however, pleasure does not necessarily mean sexual. It can mean a spiritual cleansing of ones own energy center. In many cases, however, orgasm manifests, and takes over inside and outside, as deeper breaths rise, energy expands and love abounds!

Sacred Foot Massage includes a consultation/coaching part of the session, discussion of current or recent issues, blocks and obstacles, and desires of where to arrive/goals to achieve. Then the session includes a hand to the heart, guided deep breathing, and then getting ready to soak the feet in a tub of warm bubbly water. Then massage is experienced on one foot at a time, dripping water to the rest of the leg, and massaging the rest of the leg. Then the other foot and leg is done. Often a blanket will rest over the upper part of the body, with a pillow behind the persons head and room to stretch out as they relax deeper. After the feet are done, deeper massing into the thighs is experienced, and then more of a sensual nature massage takes form. As the person surrenders they may experience full body orgasm, and as they come to rest, I may rest my hand on their heart again, or put my arm around them to allow them to surrender into the bliss and love just received. Sometimes it takes a moment to get grounded and integrate from this experience, so I will sit with them and hold them until they feel settled and ready to get up.

This is an example of one of the Spiritual Tantra Sessions I offer. There are many other examples.

Much Love and Blessings,

Asttarte

How All Sessions Go

how all sessions goHow All Sessions Go

No matter what you’re looking for, no matter what your focus is, your goals, intentions, or needs, or “program” you feel fits you best, we will always have a conversation and coaching part of a session, prior to anything else. Before meeting, we will have a pre-screening process to determine your level of spiritual experience, interest and what your next steps of spiritual growth are. Then we determine if we are going deeper into a spiritual healing session (which always precedes any tantra work), or if we are doing more of a Coaching Session, which always precedes any Sex or Intimacy Coaching as well.

Even if someone is coming for health reasons, holistic healing, general massage, or emotional healing (such as grief work, anxiety, depression, anger, a break up, a death in the family, a challenge with their relationship or their sexual concerns), we will still have a coaching aspect to any session.

If someone comes for Erectile Dysfunction, or Pre-mature Ejaculation, we will still have Coaching and/or Counseling prior to any Session, to determine if it is energetic and emotional reasons, or health related, and the best approach to take.

If someone comes for Intimacy Issues and is manifesting the wrong partner, we will go into Coaching, to determine what the pattern is, the history of all relationships, the types of relationships manifested, and the common theme of what all the issues in those relationships come up. We may do emotional healing or energy clearing to release the blocks to the previous partners, or go into a Cuddle Session and Chakra Healing work, however, Coaching and all sorts of talking is part of the session, and is addressed in the same session.

Prior to any hands on or touching aspect of any session, spiritual healing work takes place. Often it is a meditation, chakra clearing session, or a tantra meditation, however, there are other tools used prior to hands on work that may be needed, but it is not determined what is best until after meeting and the issues that are important to work on. (And, if a talking aspect to a session is needed and takes a larger amount of time, and then a spiritual healing is needed after, a longer session would be recommended, or multiple sessions to get all aspects covered).

Sometimes Reiki or Aura Clearing is needed in order to do any hands on work. Reiki energy helps moves the energetic blocks and frees up the space around a person so they radiate a higher frequency. The energy around a person is often more significant then their physical body, and any layers that are guarded or heavy will need cleansing before physical touch and closeness. If someone’s energy is too heavy, too chaotic, anxious or fear based, I will either suggest seeking solely Spiritual Healing (with myself or another practitioner first), or a professional therapist to do emotional healing work (or they can work with me on this level also if they feel comfortable). Then after these layers have been addressed, we can move into more physical healing work.

The page Spiritual Healing Coaching talks more about healing the aura, energy body, and spiritual healing. Every step counts and one leads to the next layer of creating a full body experience of bliss, joy, and profound peace and satisfaction!

And even working on healing the emotional layers of a person, can certainly and DEFINITELY take one to joy! Underneath all challenging feelings is love, and no matter what lays on top, love is always waiting!

Angry Cock

AngryCockAngry Cock

It might sound funny, but it is exactly what energy radiates from someone’s shaft if he himself is angry! I don’t mean being angry in one moment either. I mean, if his over-all personality, energy and mood is the majority of the time filled with anger, frustration, resentment, annoyance or even sexual frustration. When a woman goes to massage a male’s genitals, however he is feeling on the inside, his deeper core emotions, his cock will feel the exact same thing!

The energy of a man’s cock will take on the energy of his entire self. And, if he is desiring to connect with his beloved, she too, will feel the anger radiating off of him. She will feel his annoyance, and frustration, his impatience, his neediness, and overall anger beaming energy right off of his sacred area, in addition to his heart chakra, and everywhere else around him.

If his energy is angry and filled with these emotions mentioned above, often times a woman won’t want to connect with him, or will have a difficult time, because that energy is not a welcoming feeling. That energy actually pushes people away in the opposite direction, probably the opposite too of what he wishes they would do. An angry cock feels toxic, heavy and the opposite of loving; exactly what women desire to feel. And, if he is trying to connect to a woman, the best way to go about it, is for him to clear his angry energy first.

How Do You Clear Your Angry Cock?

The first step is to acknowledge that you might be angry. Even, if the majority of the time you think you are pretty peaceful, consider, that its possible your energy is not as peaceful as you think.

It’s possible that your cock is not angry, however, it still may have stress-filled energy around it that is causing the people, or person, in your life to have a certain reaction. And, even if that reaction is that she cannot orgasm or orgasms very little, that too is an indication that your energy is not as pure as your lover needs it to be.

The next step after acknowledging that your cock, and whole energy being, might have a certain frequency that is causing women around you to have a certain reaction, is to do your personal work.

How do you do that? The term processing might be overrated, but that’s one practice that is helpful. Find someone to talk to about your feelings, get it out in the open, and stop trying to deal with the stuff in your life all alone!

The next thing would be to take on spiritual or peace inducing practices; such as meditation, yoga, tai chi, chi gong, acupuncture, walks in nature, baths, drinking tea, etc.

Beyond this is to get a massage, but not just for the sexual frustration; the whole gamut! Get a massage, or energy healing session to release pent up energy in your entire being; your neck, shoulders, chest, back, hips, thighs, calves, hamstrings, arms, hands, feet, ankles, etc. And, when it’s time to remove pent up energy in your genitals, do it with consciousness, not with any intention to release an orgasm (not for a while at least), and remove any blocked energy of anger around your shaft.

This post is not just for women guys! It’s for men to truly get your woman, and help yourself so that you can clear and open yourself to be a match for what she desires; the authentic loving you she desired when you first met, those many moons ago!

So clear your energy and your cock feels peaceful, loving, and ultimately sexy! Isn’t that what you want your loved one(s) to feel from you anyway? 🙂

Slow Sex is Best

Slow Sex is Best

Sex, sex, sex! Everyone loves to talk about sex! But sex to one person may mean something completely different to someone else. To one person it may mean going out to dinner, having a few glasses of wine, and coming home to jump in the bed with their hunny. To another, it may mean to stay in, put everything on hold, and do it right there on the spot, spontaneously wherever they feel like it. And to another, it may mean slow foreplay, lots of intimate massage, then taking as long as possible before removing their external articles, and moving as slowly as possible after.

Most people, and in particular, most guys, think the faster the better, but that can’t be further from the truth. Guys, and women too, feel a peak of desire, and want to rush to feel some form of satisfaction. They crave the feeling of pleasure, get impatient and even become aggressive with their own body. They almost in a sense, are taking out that sense of impatience and anger on them-self, for having waited to be intimate, and don’t realize that the slower they go, they more healing, nurturing and joy they experience within. And, too, the slowness creates an energy flow, the chi, and taoist energy movement, that allows even an emotional connection to their body, feelings and experience to take place. Sometimes, the slower, the more sensual and the more emotional. Often, there is no healing without slowness, no emotional connection, no vulnerability, no sadness, and also no electric orgasm either.

There are many vibrators out on the market, and many of them, have a speed that is much too fast to allow the person to have a true tantric emotional connection or healing experience. These ‘toys’ are targeted more for people who are unable to orgasm without them, and all too often, they over-stimulate a woman, creating a somewhat dependence on the toys, and it sets the woman up for being unable to have any pleasure or release with her own partner (or herself for that matter). She then needs the toy after being with her partner, and then her husband, or boyfriend, etc. feels left out, unloved, not included in her pleasure, and it sets him up to feel failure as a lover; which is probably completely off base. She just trained herself to received pleasure from some foreign object, and can’t experience pleasure without it. Guys, it’s not your fault!

However, there is hope! Women can retrain themselves to slow down, and men can feel the satisfaction of connecting with his sweetheart and beloved deeply once again! First, I’d like to say, is that it IS possible. You first have to put the toy away. Hide it in a trunk, or the attic for a while. Try something different. Try slowing down, breathing, working with your own energy, your own breath, a gentle touch, and let your emotions come to the surface. It will create a spiral and circulating effect of self love, love for your partner, and a connection much deeper than two people experiencing a superficial orgasm at two separate times and in two different ways can ever do.

If two people in a relationship, are both desiring to be sexual, get close, but one is angry, another is frustrated, depressed, or experiencing anything other than love, fast sex often seems like the quick solution to connect and attempt to make all those feelings go away. But, those feelings don’t go away, without acknowledging them, truly feeling them, being with them, and loving them into disappearance.

Slow sex, and slow intimacy is the only way to truly acknowledge your partner, love him or her, and create a connection that is worth experiencing. Why rush when you can have so much more? 

 

Sacred Goddess Female Health

Sacred Goddess Female Health

Sacred Goddess Female HealthSacred Goddess Female Health

Every month women go through a cycle of change within their bodies. They have no control over the changes they are experiencing within. They often don’t know what is happening underneath their skin; until all of a sudden they explode with a rush of adrenalin and excitement onto their loved ones, or the innocent recipient as their mirror standing, or listening right before them. Women have powerful surges of emotions that can change from the hormones that go through the upheavel of arousal to its peak, and depletion and sizzling at the hormones come to a place of rest and completion of their cycle.

However, every month, there is the potential for the women to take charge of these feelings. They have the opportunity to observe their bodily changes; their every day moments of expression, and their energy level from a heightened joy and excited energetic response to a stillness from within; a calming agent that makes them rest, sometimes hybernate and perhaps all too often become lethargic or melodic in their rest. Women often have a passion to ignite the release by means of exercise to wild sex; all the way with a fierce power for periods of time, all the way to a gentle feminine power and calmness.

The people around these Goddess’s during their time of changes, all too often don’t know how to support the woman. They themselves may be moved into anger or confusion, and sometimes sadness that they cann’t help her, or doubt in their abilities to be of service; rejecting their own power and strength that they are capable of giving to her. So, the women need to take charge, and until she knows she needs to create balance within her hormonal changes, she cannot rise to the occasion and take care of her bodily experiences.

When a Goddess is consumed by her past, and has not healed all of the hurt inside of her, she may not know that what she is dealing with, is a normal and natural change of her hormonal response. She may need to heal within her hurt, her pain, her anger, sadness or trauma prior to the need to heal the imbalance in her body. Many women in our culture are on “the pill” so their ability to sense the changes within their bodies is limited to the strength of the medication she is on, or perhaps, if she has leveled out and feels at peace with her monthly pill, she may have some awareness of the changes she is experiencing, however, when a woman has gone all naturelle, she will feel ALL of her EVERYTHING that her body experiences, so long as she has healed all of her inner wounds, grief, feelings of her past, and so on from within. Once she has accomplished this, I want to say CONGRATUALTIONS and here are soem things to consider for creating balance on a monthly basis, and help those hormones come to rest:

YOGA FOR PMS
Yoga is general is so wonderful for the body, but there are some specific poses to help the female body expand herself from the inside, and get her circulation moving at a powerful level, and give her a little boost of self love! Some simple yoga poses that stretch the inner thighs, the stomach and the lower back are great for the woman to remind herself how wonderful and beautiful she truly is. BKS. Iyengar has a great Yoga book for Health, and the sequence for PMS is a great place to start!

CRYSTAL HEALING
Moonstone is an excellent stone for the symptoms of PMS and female health. Pietersite is great for balancing the hormones. Kunzite is awesome for calming the mind, dissolving negativity, and protecting the wearer from unwanted energies. It also stimulates sensitivity, sensuality and circulation.
It helps one to be open, strong, loving and vibrant. Tiger’s Eye is excellent to help one feel confident and strong about themselves; along with onyx. they can lift you right up out of a bad mood! Chlorite is an angel stone and great for circulation, a similar vibration to kunzite and the two together have many more benefits than what’s listed here. Blue Calcite alone is great for calming one into a space of peace and love. If no other methods are done, here is something simple to do and add as an aid to meditation, to carry on you, or in your sleep.

AYURVEDIC MEDICINE
Ayurvedic Medicine is a science all unto itself. Consider getting tested to find out your chart and what dosha you rate highest. Most people are a combination of all three dosha’s, but one or two is highest. Once you find out your score, you can take the advice of what it recommended for your type and eat, and live in accordance to what will help you balance the most! It is based off of a score of Kapha, Pitta and Vata, and usually one of those will be your natural tendency, and one or two may be out of sync. There is a diet recommended for each type and I highly recommend trying it during, before and after your moon cycle. It may also keep you balanced the whole month long!

HERBAL TEA
There are some great herbal teas for the female cycle, to balance the energies in the womb, to aid in circulation and health for her female organs and to calm the body and mind. Herbology can be so powerful when utilized and understood!

MEDITATION
Meditation alone can help to calm those nasty nerves and still the mind that often overworks during the height of female hormones. Just sitting for 5 minutes to 15 minutes in the morning before doing anything else, can completely create a day of peace, and when done throughout the day, it will help to maintain this place of balance. Use of a rosary, mala beads, a witches ladder or buddhist prayer beads can help throughout the entire day, but do remember to get the basic things done that are necessary while continuing to come back to your heart!

EXERCISE OR WALKING
If you’re in good shape or you enjoy the feeling from exercise, and it doesn’t harm your body in any way, take up a little walking, or other exercise regime for even 20 minutes a day. It will help keep your spirits high and give you a boost of energy to get your work done.

HEALING BATH
If you have the means to take a bath; alone, without little children running around disrupting you, it is so refreshing to soak in the bubbles, and add your taste of essential oils to your homemade sauna. It is so worth waiting for at the end of the day, and for those lucky ones, anytime you want!

MASSAGE
When you have a man who offers his strong hands on your body during the week or so before your moon, it is so great to just lay back and surrender to the healing he can offer you. When you don’t have someone to give to you easily, consider asking a friend, using self-massage techniques, or treat yourself to a nice relaxing massage (at any place of your choosing). It is so helpful and enjoyable during the time you need it most!

HERBAL MEDICINE
There are a few products out there to help with hormonal balance, and if you’re comfortable with taking herbal remedies, tinctures, essential oils, teas and any thing else above, herbal remedies will be a great addition to balance out your entire nature and help those hormones gain balance and control. Gaia Herbs is a great company and comes out with an herbal remedy for Women’s Balance, and a great product at theforgottenfoods.com under Women’s Health called Sacred Womb.  I also highly recommend the Nutritional Almanac!



If you have any other ideas and you want to add it to this list, please make a comment on this blog, or write to me directly. I will add your suggestion per our conversation and gladly offer it to the women who read this blog! Thank you so much for reading. And I look forward to connecting with you again soon!

Blessings Sisters and Namaste~
Asttarte

Intention of a Temple Home

The Temple Home will be offering a whole body Retreat Center for Healing, Yoga, relaxation, therapy and Transformation in Philadelphia.

Yin Yoga Classes
Reiki Classes & Certifications
Massage Therapy Sessions
Acupressure Sessions
Healing Classes
Meditation Classes

If you are not on my newsletter, send me an email to asttarte@awakentoliving.com to stay connected with Asttarte and to hear of the new opportunities as they arrive!

Also, check out the new website for the Healing & Retreat Center with a complete integration of all possible sessions and spiritual awakenings available!

Location of home is yet to be determined. Open to discussion on possible locations in the Philadelphia area.

Transformational Healing and Coaching

Transformational Healing and Coaching

Transformational Healing and Coaching Who are you and why are you here? What is your life purpose and your mission?

What are you incomplete with? Is there a change you want to create for your relationship (s)?

Are you happy in your career?

Do you want more intimacy in your life?

Are you doing what you love?

Are you inspired and passionate about life?

Let’s visit some of these areas of your life and find what you want to work on to create a more joyful, fulfilling, loving and motivated life. We will sit together in conversation, in a relaxed environment and start with simple breathing to be in a calm state to create a beautiful session. We will create possibilities through our conversation of what we want the session to look like. We will cover areas of your life that you feel unresolved or incomplete with that you want to work on. Other possibilities of the session may be massage therapy, past life healing, inner child healing, tarot reading, energy healing, chakra balancing, chakra meditation, and more.

What do you want to create for your life, and how long are you willing to wait?

Thank you for the opportunity in meeting you!