Healing Sexual Wounding and Divorce

Healing Sexual Wounding and DivorceHealing Sexual Wounding and Divorce

I’ve been working with someone for the past few months and the issue around old partners who walked in with other lovers have come up, feelings of rejection, feelings of secrecy, abandonment, and being alone. When you’re going through a divorce, there may be A LOT of layers that come up around your ex-lover. There may be feelings of loss, rejection, abandonment, fears and a deep loneliness that shows up.

If your ex was very secretive and there was little communication about how he or she lived their life, and they put up walls of protection to keep you from knowing who they really were, then they may feel rejected, lied to, unloved, unsupported and mis-understood. All of these layers can take weeks and sometimes months to unravel and work through.

Be honest about how you feel. Ask your partner to be honest about how he or she feels. In order to build trust with someone new, you have to let go of the layers with the old.

There is no rushing the process. However, you feel in each moment is important to process. If you have a partner, a beloved, a lover, or a therapist to process these feelings with, it is crucial to get the help to release these deep seated feelings. Eventually they will leave, release, and you will feel more whole than you ever had before. Please be patient with yourself. Once you’ve opened the flood gates, there’s no going back, but the journey to get to the other side is not an easy one. Have patience on yourself and on the ones you love!

Healing Sexual Wounding and DivorceHealing Sexual Wounding and Divorce

Pain to Orgasmic Pleasure

Pain to Orgasmic Pleasure

Pain to Orgasmic PleasurePain to Orgasmic Pleasure

How many women out there have ever felt the experience of pain after making love several times, and instead of going deeper into the pain, felt as though they needed to take a break from sex for a while from the discomfort? Going from pain to orgasmic pleasure is possible!

Sometimes the pain in a female’s genitalia is a sign that there is something on the other side of that pain. A women experiences pressure on your yoni, her internal bones, and all walls of her vaginal interior and feels as though the sex may have been too rough. And she decides to back off, making her ravenous and eager lover calm down to pleasure himself alone instead.

How about try something else on ladies? When you feel the pain inside, notice it without judgment. Know your man loves you, deep within you, and wouldn’t want to hurt you. If he is your partner, beloved, husband, boyfriend or regular lover, his true desire is to just be with you, feel you close and pleasure you. This makes him happy! When you feel the pain, try going into intimacy and sex again, and notice the pressure inside you, and then give him a warning, “I need to pull out!” Then pull out slowly, and feel your female nectar starting to rise! Push out like there is something there you’re trying to get rid of, and notice a hint of liquid rushing. Then go back to making love, and try this again. You might notice the nectar get more and more each time. But the only way for it to run out of you, is to remove the object in the way (temporarily), by getting off or pulling away from your lover, and then pushing your insides out. You will notice the ability and beginnings of ejaculation if you have not experienced it before.

When it has been a while or is the first time, the female g-spot needs the pressure in order for it to be activated. The normal initial response is pain. And often women think that means they need to back off, but that is the furthest from what actually the body needs. She needs the pressure, which stimulates the pain, then back off for a moment, the freedom to push, and then back in again, to keep your man wanting more, and you as well.

Sometimes the amount of nectar is so enormous, that the women will feel orgasms running around again and again, in a circular manner, and repeating itself, and you’ll need to get multiple towels for her because she might not stop pushing. The pushing is the orgasms, and after a moments rest, another soon comes. She needs you to help her, be there, love her, and let her know you think its awesome and are supportive.

The pain does lead to pleasure! If you know what the pain is about, you’ll know how to get to the other side!

Every women’s g-spot is located in a different place. Some is close to the exit, some is half way back, and others all the way deep inside. Explore her location together, and find positions that will trigger it that will work for both of you. Make it a game! Make it fun! Explore the ride, and you’ll both be thankful! Sometimes on the other side of something foreign, unknown and painful, is a very glorious ride!

See also  Empowerment Coaching for Women

Polyamory and Marriage: When You Want Your Husband and Someone else shows up!

Polyamory and Marriage - when you want your husband and someone else shows upWhen You Want Your Husband and Someone Else Shows Up. This is the pitfall of many relationships. A woman is craving connection with the man she loves, and what happens is that her man is unavailable. He’s busy or preoccupied, or his interest has dwindled and he has other concerns and things he wants to focus on. She’s deeply saddened and desperate to gain his attention, but he’s always somewhere else, emotionally or physically.

In a Polyamorous Marriage this is perfectly fine. There is an agreement between both partners that they are allowed to be with other lovers, so long as the structure of the relationship is maintained. However, if the foundation of the marriage is rocky, or there has been very little connection, intimacy and commitment between the two partners, straying from the marriage can feel like cheating, or in Christian terms “committing adultery”.

When you’re in love with your husband (or significant beloved) and there is no intimacy, your heart tears up inside. You want his commitment. You want his willingness to do what it takes to be there for you, stay by your side and give you his all! But when you have waited and waited for him to show up in this way, and all of a sudden someone else shows up, most of the time, it is like God giving you the gift you have been waiting for! You fall prey to this new amazing being that you are so deeply drawn to, and your wish has been granted. Then the big question is: what do you do next? Do you continue to wait for the man you deeply love, or do you continue to fall into the arms of another? How long are you truly willing to wait? If waiting is putting your life on hold, perhaps waiting is not what your supposed to be doing anyway. Perhaps, you ARE supposed to be enjoying life and just surrender to what life gives you!

Read more posts for women at HealingSacredWoman.com

Read more posts on my Tantra site at TrueTantra.net

Loving a Man Who Won’t Commit

Loving a man who Won't CommitIt is important for women to be treated and adored for who we are, but is even more important that the man (the main man if you are polyamorous or have an open relationship) we are with eventually choose us fully, make a decision and commit. Loving a man who won’t commit eventually wears on us and tears us down. We start to resent them, regret our choices and spend our time and lives dreading the choice we made in being with him but also torn because our core wants him to just commit fully already.

Some women don’t care about marriage, and are happy being free-spirits for the rest of their lives, but many women prefer the latter. I myself, spent the last 8 years waiting for the man I love to finally choose me, settle down, pick up the plate in his career and get us a place to move in together. As a tantrica who has been trained in the sexual healing arts, and has been giving for a long time deep healing for others, it has been devastating to be the one who didn’t get what she wanted.

Do you know what happens to a woman’s yoni when she is not being fully embraced in her love and her sexuality and supported to go really deep with her true beloved? Her yoni (womb/sexual organ) clamps down. It disappears into itself, and instead of expanding outside and being fully open, orgasmic and ready for love, her flower gets tight and hides. Many times a woman’s flower hides out of fear, or anger or sadness, but sometimes it hides simply because it is not being seen. Just as she is not being seen, so too is her yoni! They go hand and hand and together when they are supported and loved, they both also rock the world and ignite anyone who is near her!

Loving a Man who Won’t Commit and women’s sexuality are like partner’s in crime. In order to fully ignite your sexuality, choose everything that works for ‘you’, and life will bring you flowers!